My Valentine's Day

When I was younger it was so important for my husband to participate in the valentines rituals. When our kids were young, it seemed to put a strain on our family budget, flowers, gifts, dinner, babysitter- not to mention he always wanted to do the same for his 3 daughters. As I have grown up and matured,I have realized how commercialized it has all become and how "keeping up with the Joneses" is so important. Since Charles has been working overseas, I have gotten flowers on Valentines, and many other important occassions and just because he loves me. I dont need flowers, candy, gifts or dinner out to know my valentine loves me.

He works hard for our family. I want to share a little about my Valentine- we met Jan 1984, were engaged by April and married Sept. 8, 1984. I fell in love with a man that had an incredible capacity for unconditional love and forgiveness. I knew if he could overcome some of the challenges of his life and still walk in love and forgiveness, then I knew he could love me the same way. I have seen him work 3 jobs, work on college algebra while holding a fussy baby, fix anything that breaks, get a college degree while working fulltime and graduate Cumma Sum Laude. He has faced favortism, prejudice, stupidity and ignorance, and always come out on top. He is a Godly husband and father, often walking around our property and praying before going back overseas, or anointing our children and home with oil as he prays for his family. He does not preach to our children, simply lives what he believes.

He has led an adventurous life, and brought me right along with him. He has worked in some of the harshest conditions. He has worked in Bosnia, Hungary, Kosovo,Iraq, and Turkey, slept in private homes, tents, and containers. He has dined on MREs,local cuisine, and military institutional food, but still prefers mine! He has taken me to some of the most beautiful places. We have snowmobiled through Yellowstone, para sailed in Cancun, vacationed along the north sea, sailed with the Elissa, skied down beautiful snow covered mountains, camped out and played in rivers and the greatest adventure- raised 5 children together. He has worked hard for me to stay home and provide stability for our children.

We may argue and get crossed up, we are so very different. However, our marriage is strong and our commitment to each other is unfailing. So for valentine's day this year, there were no cards, no flowers (at my request) just a long phone conversation with the one I love.

I am so happy to be married to my valentine- and so proud to call him mine!

This Weeks Menu

Fri.
Ranch Chicken- ( didn't use this last week)
brocolli and Rice
Carrots
Sat.
crockpot lasagna
salad ( from the garden)
homemade french bread
Sun.
undecided
Mon.
Bean and Cheese Burritos
Spanish Rice
Chips and Salsa
Tues.
Corn Chowder
crusty bread
Wed.
oven fried chicken
mashed pots/gravy
green beans
Thurs.
Parmesan crusted Tilapia
Hushpuppies
Sauteed greens
roasted potatoes

The past couple of weeks have been really calm and peaceful around our house. I love the rythym of life without drama. I was able to complete a new outfit for Baylee and started a new one. Emily and I had the priviledge of sitting with a friends 3 mth old twins, that is always fun.

The foods I canned over the spring and summer are really starting to dwindle. I am looking forward to another garden and restocking our shelves.

As for everything else, we are just moving along at a steady pace. I always feel as though these times are the calm before the storm.

Have a good weekend.

Schedules

Over the years I have had( as everyone else) to learn how to adapt and adjust my schedule according to the activities and ages of our children. When I only had 2 young children my home stayed clean and organized, but when our third child came along it all came to a screeching stop. I remember one particular day when my sister stopped by and was shocked at the clutter and toys and general chaotic condition of my home. She asked " what happened?" I simple stated " 3 kids"...I also remember another visitor, a dear friend of my husband's who was from Pakistan, he dropped by and , as usual, my home was rather messy. I apologetically invited him into our home. He responded with " you are a mom and you have a house full of kids, if your home is perfect all the time you are spending too much time on your house and not enough time with your kids" . I have taken that tidbit of wisdom and live by it and have passed it on. I had a clean home, but not a perfect home. For most of you that read this blog, you will not be able to relate to having a large family or HS them.

I set aside 2 days a week to do what I call Major House cleaning, then just maintain the other days. Mondays and Thursdays ( it used to be Fridays- but just couldnt get it in with the errands). This way I clean up after the weekend and before the weekend.

We always used a chore chart, I started off teaching my kids by giving them 1 chore for a week, then would rotate. When my youngest 2 were too young to do a chore alone, they paired up with an older sibling to work together. As they got older I changed to dividing the house into 5 areas and gave each child a section and rotated each day. On Saturdays they would clean outside, vehicles, garage or whatever extra and Sundays was a day of rest- no chores. Chores started as early as 18 months, helping me with things they could do, ie helping with laundry ( carrying the washcloths to bathroom cabinet), helping pick up toys and clean their room.

I would also give myself some guidelines to keep me from getting overwhelmed with jobs that needed to be done. I would assign days to focus on certain tasks- Tues- sewing ,mending, ironing. I taught my kids to iron by stating with pillow cases-even my boys have learned how to use an iron. Thursdays, also meant yard day- and as the boys were old enough to do the yard the focus changed to girls cleaned inside and boys did outside. ( The boys learned how to clean everything inside too - it just need the help with the yard ) Wed- baking. Saturday evening were used to make sure all the clothes needed for church on Sunday were ready-ironing of shirts or finding of shoes and socks- cut down on the frustrations on Sunday morning. A quick word to moms of boys, teach them to cook- whoever was in the kitchen had to help prepare the meals.

Laundry has ALWAYS been a challenge- As soon as my kids were old enough - about 10- I gave them their own laundry basket and taught them how to seperate and do laundry. Then the were each given a day of the week to do their laundry. This cut down on the mad rush for the washer and laundry from piling up, as bad. On the chore chart I had a laundry day and on those days I would pay my kids to do extra loads of clothes- they must be washed and dried to get paid. Here is how that would work- their personal laundry, 2 loads of general wash, then anything over that was paid at 50 cents per load. This gave them the opportunity of earning money and incentive to get the laundry done on their day to do wash.

This brings me to the subject of allowances- we tried allowances but found my kids were not as motivated to do chores or any extra jobs around that might need to be done. So I did work out a plan of "paying" my kids for extras. There again were guidelines- room had to be clean, school work completed and a daily chore- all done without complaining, arguing or reminding. Then, if I had some particular task that needed to be done, they could earn extra money by doing a good job, but it had to be done right... I am a stickler on that one. Example would be extra laundry, or pulling weeds in the garden, sweeping the garage or porches- just what ever I needed done, they had an opportunity to earn money for going over and beyond the basics.

Now comes to our school schedule- I started out, as most ambitious hs moms with the traditional big breakfasts. After several years of battling the breakfast dishes and getting school going at a decent our- Big family breakfast fell by the wayside- My kids were old enough to make their own breakfast and clean up their own mess- We do this today. Unless its a special occasion- When Charles comes home he loves getting up and making breakfast and getting the kids up to eat with him. School started at 9, lunch at 12 and resumed at 1230 and ended when assignments were completed- usually around 2-3. Some days earlier and somedays later. We would do 1/2 days on Fridays. I general focused on spelling test, math tests and chapter tests on those days. When my children were in elementary school, because I still had younger children, the schedule was bit different- lunch at 12 then 2 hour rest time on their beds reading books quietly. I needed the break and rest, i also took this time to get supper started. School usually went to 330 then, if needed. No matter what- school was finished at 4 pm. I had to have time to get dinner completed and let my kids get outside and run around.

At 5 pm ( when Charles was working stateside), we would transition to the driveway and get out skates, scooters and chalk- and play while waiting on him to come home.

Now these schedules and chores were general guidelines that I used to keep me motivated and on task. There was always room for field trips, emergencies, play dates and ministry. Our schedules were also changing as our kids got older and were involved in extracurricular activities. That is where the love affair with my crockpot began--- but thats for another time!

I use alot of the guidelines today, as I am still a sahm and hs mom. My job is my home and family. Though I have much more freedom in my schedule and hs 1 highschool girl is so much less demanding.

I hope this encourages you and you can gleen something from what I have learned!

Charles and I and our beautiful/handsome Kids. ( L to R) Michael - 21, Rebecca-18, John-20, Emily-16 and Rachel 24

This Weeks Menu

My menus start on Friday and end on Thurs., crazy I know. This schedule comes from years of homeschooling and raising 5 kids while dh worked overseas. Its a hard habit to break, so "if it ain't broke, don't fix it" ( sorry for the grammar).

Friday

Crockpot BBQ meatballs ( ready made in the freezer)

Macaroni and Cheese ( homemade)

Baked Beans ( this is one time I use canned -Bushes Baked Bean)

Saturday

Crockpot Ranch Chicken( using hidden valley ranch mix- but when its all used up will switch to a homemade version)

Broccoli and Rice

Carrots ( canned this summer - thanks mom)

Sunday

Fellowship Meal at Church

Individual Cherry Pies ( the last of my canned cherry pie filling) and homemade cookies

Super Bowl Snacks- not exactly sure what that looks like- letting my girls make that menu

Monday

Spaghetti and Meatballs ( using my freshly canned Spaghetti Sauce)

Garlic Toast ( will make fresh french bread)

Salad ( from the garden)

Tuesday

Chicken and Dumplings

buttered homemade french bread

zucchini rounds

Wednesday

Chicken Teriyaki

Brown Rice

Homemade Eggrolls ( using coconut oil to fry)

Thursday

Cedar plank salmon

Hushpuppies ( baked not fried)

Rice Pilaf

Roasted Bussel Sprouts

Breakfasts- I dont make breakfast- but I always have these foods available

Oatmeal

Homemade granola and greek yogurt

Eggs

Bagels

Toast

Smoothies

Cranberry Orange Scones-I will make these on Sat and hope they last more than 1 day!

biscuits and gravy, jelly, or syrup

Pancakes/waffles

Muffins

Lunches- I do not make lunch, but always have these items available

any leftovers

quesadillas

grilled cheese

soups

pastas

homemade pizza

tuna/chicken salad

sandwiches

Snacks

yogurt and homemade granola

fruit

veggies

taboullah on mini toast

homemade energy bars/ snacks bites

cinnamon toast

pita chips

tortilla chips- homemade salsa

cheese and crackers

peanut butter and crackers

homemade cheese crackers

Majority of my food is made from scratch, with the exception of the meatballs and baked beans, this week. Meatballs are an item that I will occasionally buy and have in the freezer. I prefer to make them, but it is not always possible.

Here are some general guidelines I try to follow ( remember its a process and a journey,I am not always perfect)

I will try every couple of weeks to "cook it forward", my silly way of saying prepare ahead of time. That is also one of my goals this year. This week will make biscuits and scones, freeze them unbaked.

I try to cook with as little white processed sugar as possible, I will use Sucanat, honey, agave nectar, maple syrup or stevia

I have fish every Thursday.

Eat more chicken than red meat.

Rarely fry, and if on that occasion I do- I use cococut oil

I use only olive oil and butter

organic eggs, milk and butter

Almond milk for drinking or with cereal

NO sodas, juices, or powdered drinks- unless its organic no or low sugar apple juice

I buy coconut water for my kids when they want something besides water- i prefer this over sports drinks ( still working on breaking that habit, but when nausea is an issue I will use it)

No boxed or prepared foods ( as a general rule- but will use something in a pinch)

I only make dessert on the weekends

I buy organic as much as possible

No chips, unless it is pita or tortilla

Chicken is hormone free and Natural

Dont us condensed soups in casseroles- dont make many casseroles

Meatless one day per week- most of the time ( not this week)

I try to limit eating out to a maximum of 1 time per week

As I earlier stated I do my shopping and errands on Fridays. My dh has been working overseas off and on for 16 years. During the times he was gone, we were hs 5 children and I needed to set aside one day a week for shopping. I started out with only having school 4 days, and on fridays had 2 girls come babysit and help clean house. This was usually the only day I got out alone. Then as the children got older and I could leave them alone, we had 1/2 day of school on Fridays , they would do their assignments then have chores to do while I was shopping. This worked out great. As children graduated it changed again to leaving my two youngest home while i did the grocery shopping, then would pick them up for lunch out and finish my errands. If anyone needed anything we would take this time to get it. I now have 1 left home on Fridays ( occasionally another will be here when she is off work), so I still get out in the morning get my groceries and any other shopping I want to do, then pick her up and have lunch together. We then spend a couple of hours together,just hanging out-either shopping for her or just for inspiration...

Please leave a comment and let me know what you think!

Today's Plans

Today I will be making a mix that help keep me going in the kitchen without having to resort to boxed,canned or ready made supplies. First, let me clarify, none of these recipe mixes are original. They either come from the internet or books. I learned over a year ago how to make a "condensed" soup recipe that I have used in place of canned condensed soups. It takes a bit of planning to get into the habit of not relying on canned products, but once you get it down it is easy. Here is what I have been doing and then I will post a recipe for a mix to which I am switching.

I basically make a white sauce using butter, flour and chicken broth ( made from chicken base and water), then add some dried onions, salt and pepper. I cook it until it reaches desired thickness. I use this for anything calling for condensed chicken soup. I am changing over to help my girls learn how to cook without canned soups.

Here is what I am making today:

Condensed Soup Mix

2 Cups dry milk

3/4 Cup cornstarch

1/4 Cup chicken bouillion ( either powdered or crushed cubes)

4 Tbsp dried minced onion

1 tea. dried basil

1 tea. dried parsley

1 t pepper

mix well and store in airtight container- use 1/3 cup dry mix with 1 1/4 cups water, cook until

thick.

If I were to need cream of mushroom I would use the same recipe but substitute dry mushrooms for the chicken boullion. Or use the white sauce recipe above and add milk instead of chicken broth then add fresh or dried mushrooms.

I will also be making some energy/snack bars and baked cheddar crackers ( like goldfish).

Cleaning my house, laundry and school ( though Emily needs very little help from me). Making my menu and grocery/errand list for Friday. I also will complete alterations on Baylee's skirt.

It will be a busy day, but I will enjoy doing what I do at home.